This is, incredibly, not too far off the norm for Tiziano Crudeli, journalist, commentator and Milan fan extraodinaire. He’s a touch passionate about the Rossoneri and as one would expect, more than a touch passionate for icon Pippo Inzaghi’s last game for the club on the weekend. Standard fare…

And then Pippo scored. What then transpired is the reason why the internets were invented in Al Gore’s mother’s basement. Sit back and enjoy, with volume at reasonable levels.

Tiziano’s finest moments after the jump. Well, perhaps not finest…but they’re moments.

Enjoy Landycakes enjoying some First Bottom. In a room of armed men hell bent on protecting the object of his lurid fantasies at all costs.

Or maybe they’re there hunting down that dude straight out of the WWII flick on the left, looking like he’s about to pillage something. (No comment.)

And David clearly has a healthier respect for Michelle Obama’s derriere, while Landon is thinking about a cheap motel and some wine in a box.

Cripes, Manchester City’s all over the place these days. One supposes with that ending they’re allowed to be. Also: money’s compelling. Don’t ever think otherwise.

They won the title this weekend after spending oodles and oodles of money the last few seasons. One oodle was Samir Nasri, you might recall, one of their big purchases before this current season, having left an Arsenal side which has struggled for trophies in recent years. He was happy enough to remind them of this small fact.

“I now hope the Arsenal fans can get on with their lives and forget me, they should celebrate their third-place achievement and I will focus on winning titles.”

This team isn’t going to have ego and/or personality issues anytime soon. No sir.

Who knew Wolves – Wigan would have the best scene of the EPL weekend?

Some bolder than thou Wolves fan sauntered into a March of the Cantaloupes and charged scores of Wigan fans. Presumably he had a decent reason. Or was reasonably sauced. One of those. Even better, all the Wigan fans run away. There are superheros and fictional cats from beer commercials with less pull over the masses than this gent.

Kun’s got nothin’.

[101gg]

At current pace, the Manchester Derby could settle right below Clasico levels in a few years time. The spending and success on the blue side of town will only breed animosity, while history still remains firmly in the red half of town.

Plus Carlos Tevez will be involved* and nothing fans the flames like a sign celebrating Fergie’s ultimate demise. Even though neither he nor Manchester United will be rendered an afterthought anytime soon.

(* – Maybe. So long as he doesn’t move closer to Buenos Aires, such as the Allsvenskan or something.)

[Spotted on 101gg]

For no apparent reason, the canine urination celebration is taking hold of Europe. Or it’s happened twice off the top of my head, which is far too many and certainly deserving of pandemic status. The first was Zenit’s Danny, merely celebrating a goal. Now Felipe Melo was so excited by winning the Turkish Super Lig, he couldn’t help by mime a tinkle.

The remonstrations of Fenebahce’s fans seem more tolerable in comparison.

Yesterday, preceding one of the most astonishing league finales ever to be seen in our lifetimes, a more commonplace phenomenon was observed: Joey Barton. He was sent off for extracurriculars before the hour mark, putting his famously good behavioral regulation skills on show. (Charged not once but twice for violent conduct. Overachiever.)

And then, as is often the case in the social media age, Twitter happened. Well, Alan Shearer happened, and then Joey Barton on Twitter happened, more specifically.

The following is a snippet. He took down Gary Lineker on the way as well.

Shearer condemned the player, who he coached during his short spell managing Newcastle in 2009, during Sunday night’s Match of the Day, prompting Barton’s rant.

“Shearers still on my case… “I know I f*cked up Alan, thanks for stating the obvious,” Barton tweeted.

He added: “Whilst were both stating the obvious about each other, can I just say for the record what a great player u were. Well better me…

“But I have a better hair (which is not hard), wear well better shirts on TV and have a personality(something u lack).

“P.S. My final point, ur a s*** pundit/manager…

“I really don’t like that prick, in fact I honestly despise him… Goodnight.

“I’d take it off Hansen and @GaryLineker but not from that bell, same fella that stamped on Neil Lennon …”. He added: “Selfish, boring man him. He can do one…

His explanation of the sending off? “Things happen on the pitch, in the heat of battle sometimes.”

He’s apparently in heat an awful lot.

This is both wonderful and a wonderful departure from the standard footballing related videos you’ll find on the YouTube.

Even better, however, is that it’s apparently part of a small series of videos, this one for England while the rest deal with the domestic game and specifically, Crystal Palace. The potential of this on a larger scale for England during the Euros is immensely enticing. Or London 2012 if the Great Britain team somehow gets Golden McNuggets involved.

[Spotted on 101gg]

But still, the man got to be a Calvin Klein model, ascending to a plateau well below Becks levels of fame, but notoriety well beyond his playing level. Turns out this is not such a good thing, and his manhood paid a dear price, with lots of undesired handprints and the such.

Male sexual harassment is real, and Freddie knows it.

Although it’s entirely possible he’s confusing the “night clubs” with any variety of defenders prone to goosing in the middle of a match. Or even just Jens Lehmann being Jens Lehmann.

“Advertising was fun to do, but had unexpected consequences for my personal life. The price was simply too high,” Ljungberg told Di.se.

“It sounds so cocky and I will not whine, but if, for example, I’d go to a night club, girls would come up and grab my crotch. Just like that.

“It was happening everywhere. They came from behind, side, pulled and tugged at me. The worst part was that you could not do a damn thing about it. When I angrily removed my hands, people just laughed.

Juventus won the scudetto this past weekend, and deservedly so as they were the best team in the peninsula this year. Sometimes, that’s just how it works. In celebration, they’re hoisting all sorts of glittered beacons of success, including the scudetto tally for their brand new stadium.

Slight problem, however. They don’t seem to be on board with those stripped scudetti during the Calciopoli scandal, instead happily counting them among their spoils despite the records keeping them firmly at 28. Plus they’ll be grabbing a third star, one for every ten titles. Ten doesn’t fit evenly into 28. I learned that…well, a long time ago.

And they are adamant that they’ll keep considering it 30. So there are a number of creative ways in which fans and officials alike can deduct two from Juventus next season, if just for fun.